Addie's Story

This is my sweet friend Addie Mietus. We met at our adoption classes about 11 years ago. Instantly we had a connection through our heartache of infertility. I was so desperate for someone who could relate to what I was going through at that time in my life. Addie was a answere to my prayer and has continued to be an amazing support to me for the past 11 years. There are many others we have met along the way and have had wonderful, deep relationships with as we have gone through the journey of infertility and adoption. It is never fun to feel alone. If you or someone you know is searching for love and support as they are going through their own journey of infertility or adoption please contact me at kim.jon@hotmail.com. Addie and I want to put together a support group and it is going to be AWESOME!!!

 

I AM BACK!!!!

Okay girls, I have to say I am so sorry that I have neglected this blog for so long. After Lia came along my life seemed so perfect and I was consumed with how happy I was to have three amazing kids. I didn't think I had much to offer this blog anymore. What makes me so happy is to see that there are many of you that have still felt the need to share and receive. Because of some things I have gone trough recently I feel a strong desire to connect with all of you again and seek out and find any others who may be going through the difficult trial of starting or adding to their family. I have come to know that no matter the situation infertility is a on going trial and a trial that we may always face. What I also know is that we can find peace as we strive to move forward in our desire to start or add to our families. It is a frustrating and heart breaking process but in the end we can reach our goal of having a family one way or another. My husband and I have sacrificed EVERYTHING we can to have a family and it has paid off for us. It has not happened in the time frame or in the way we thought, and it has NOT been easy!!!! But three amazing miracles found their way to our home because we were willing to do what ever it took. So what I am trying to say is don't give up, even if it feels like more than you can bare hold on a little longer. Your miracle will come!

I am so excited to get this thing going again and to hear from all of you. Please spread the word and check back for some changes that will be comming in the next couple of months. I really want to re vamp this blog and make it even better. Thanks to all of you for your continued support.

All my Love, Kim

Finally

Lucas Clark Orval Avery

After 13 1/2 years of trying to have a family, my hubby and I were blessed on 8/28/12 with the birth of our son. I want to thank all of the ladies on this blog. They helped me become stronger and not feel like I was the only one going through infertility problems. I talk openly about my situation and feel that my experience has given other in my shoes the strength to endure it themselves. I would have never done this without this sanctuary.

 I have a huge testimony that Heavenly Father does answer prayers, just not on our time. I am so grateful for the experience I gained from this trial and feel that I am a totally better person for it.

Thanks again.
Stephanie Avery

The end and the beginning....

The end of our adoption journey looked like this:

A tiny baby boy born June 3rd. 

A TOTAL surprise, we read about his situation the morning of June 8th, found out we'd been chosen by the birth-mother that night, left June 9th to travel the 10+ hours it would take us to get to him, met his birth-family that night, his birth-mother signed relinquishment on the 10th (when we first got to see him), ICPC came through the 12th, and we left to bring him home on the 19th when he'd hit the 4 lb mark and was eating all of his food from the bottle and not the NG tube.

He was very healthy to begin with (the NICU nurses called him a "feeder-gainer") and has grown like crazy.  He now weighs what our daughter weighed when she was born (just over 7 lbs) and he's progressing just like any other 2 month old - except in weight and height.

We feel so very blessed to be at the beginning of another adventure!

My love and thanks to ALL of you for your love, encouragement and support over the years.  It has truly been so wonderful to come here and know that I was never alone in my infertility.  I pray that all of you will find the endings (and or beginnings) you are hoping for!

Hello? Anyone here anymore?

I can't believe that I was the last one to post on here. I guess everyone has moved on to greener pastures, eh? Maybe there isn't a real need for this blog anymore, but I wanted to share some feelings to see if anyone out there has experienced anything similar.

So just to catch you up, things between us and our daughter's birth-mom are back to normal. Tender mercies from heaven were involved when we finally met her little boy (our failed placement) and we knew he wasn't meant to be in our family. From there it was a matter of forgiveness... which was easier with her (than with her parents) because we have some understanding of how difficult it was for her to place Mimi with us. The full story has come out over the past year and a half, and even things with her family are getting back to normal. Not that there is complete trust anymore, but it is a relief that we can interact and still love each other.

The past few weeks have been grueling for the hubby and I. We finally decided on one last push to find another baby for our family. We branched out and put our profile up on Parent Profiles, printed up pass-along cards and began handing them out to friends and families, printed up brochures to go along with the pass-along cards and began giving them out to lawyers, have checked into private adoption agencies and tried to sell my hubby's beloved truck to get the money for a private adoption- all in hopes of bringing home the baby boy I keep dreaming about. We decided we'd do all we possibly could for one more year (after our home-study expires this summer) and then...we'll be done. We'll let our home-study expire and take our names out of the "hoping to adopt" pool.

And I have mixed emotions about it.

We were hoping to have another baby before Mimi turned four because we didn't really want to raise our children as singles - too far apart to fight and bicker and someday (hopefully) be good friends when they grew up. The hubby told me the other day that it breaks his heart to walk past Mimi's room and hear her playing all by herself. She doesn't seem to mind too much, but coming from big families where our mothers had all of us fairly close together, this worries us. She will turn six this fall. She will be so much older than any baby we get now that we worry about them bonding and having the kind of relationships that we have with our siblings. We've come to the conclusion that if she is our only child that we are going to try to give her some amazing opportunities and at the same time work at not spoiling her ridiculously. We've already been so blessed to do things together that we never could have done had we gotten another baby, so we know we are incredibly blessed. And if she is our only child I will consider myself lucky to have had a relatively easy baby period of no blown out diapers, rare middle of the night feedings and 6 hours of solid sleep every night until she was about 6 weeks old when it changed to 8. Even now she is an easy-going little girl with such a friendly personality, no fear of riding roller coasters and a helpful disposition. (I know, I'm probably in for it when she hits her teenage years! LOL!)

We've been so lucky and so very blessed.

We just thought there would be at least two children in our family.

But having just turned the corner on 36 and moving fast toward 37 I am seeing wrinkles and fat deposits and health concerns suddenly flying at me at light speed and both the hubby and I are thinking that starting over again at 39-40 isn't a great idea for us. We want to be young enough to enjoy our kids without having them have to push us around in wheelchairs, you know? ;)

Some people have said that we're putting a time limit on Heavenly Father. And I respond with, "How did you know you were done having kids? Don't we deserve the same opportunity to choose when our family will be complete?" Most "fertiles" have no idea what its like in the hellish waiting-for-another-baby limbo and just think we're being selfish.

*sigh*

I guess that along with being branded "Infertile" we'll also take "Misunderstood" and "Judged" from some of our closest friends and family. Sad, but true.

Have any of you been in this position? What did you decide to do?