Hi all, after an extended absence from blogland, I'm back. Tomorrow morning Brian and I are going in for a 3rd (and final) IUI. We felt like it'd be good to give it one more shot. If it doesn't work, then we'll do either in vitro or adopt. Wish us luck!
If anyone is wondering about the whole donor sperm thing, we actually reached a decision. Before our trip the bishop called us in on an unrelated matter (changing callings), but we decided to take the opportunity to remind him of our situation and get his take on all of this. He was kind and encouraging, and didn't necessarily warn us against using donor sperm. He just said he knew that we'd make the right decision for us, and reminded us that if all of this infertility stuff doesn't work out, there are still beautiful blessings to be had through the miracle of adoption. After a week on vacation at the beach, we came to the conclusion that for now, donor sperm just isn't right for us. We might revisit that option in the future, but neither of us felt 100% comfortable with it right now.
On a positive note, I think Brian's opinion of adoption is changing. Unfortunately, the costs for both in vitro and adoption are staggering. If this IUI doesn't work out, we might just get our adoption papers together and get on a list while continuing to try naturally for the next few months. If we got chosen quickly, we would have enough money to pay for the adoption plus a bit leftover to use for future fertility treatments a few years down the road. On the other hand, if we just did in vitro, I feel like we'd be putting all of our eggs in only 2 baskets (pardon the pun), because we only have enough money to try it twice, max, and then we're out of money and unable to afford an adoption.
I feel like this is definitely major progress for us, and I know the Lord's plan for us will be revealed as long as we are prayerful.
Tuesday, August 26, 2008
Third Time's a Charm?
Posted by Hillary at 3:27 PM
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6 comments:
You are doing the right things and the Lord will bless you for your efforts. I have to remind myself of this all of the time. It is hard to emagine that a lot of money doesn't go very far in our situation. Did you look into the shared risk program? It really has a lot of bennifits to it. We are routing for you and who nows made this IUI will work. Have faith and hang in there!!!
Love Kim
Fabulous news Hillary!
Good luck with this next IUI, I'll be praying for you.
Also, with the adoption route - most health insurance companies have an adoption benefit (IHC and Blue Cross PPO for sure) that ranges from $2500.00 to $3500.00. Once placement transpires, you submit the paperwork and they will mail you a check. When you file taxes for that year, you do not need to include the payment from your insurance company as a reimbursement. It is a benefit that you pay for by choice, and therefore does not need to be documented. (We learned this the hard way.)
There is also a substantial Adoption tax credit that you receive when you file the next year's taxes. I think the limit on the credit is still $10,000.00, but you can include cost of adoption and any legal fees (though you probably won't be needing that last one!) If there is any credit left over, it actually rolls into the next tax year.
Some employers also offer an adoption benefit. If either of yours do, you need to claim it on your tax return as an employer reimbursement, and it will be excluded from your tax credit.
Perhaps you already know all of this, but we were in the dark with our adoption, so I like to blab to everyone about the tax benefits!
Again, good luck, and I'm so glad you've made a solid decision and have a wonderful plan in place!
Love, Kerith
Oh Hillary, what a decision. Im glad to hear that you and brian were able to make your decision about the donor sperm. Good luck with your iui, i'll be praying for you extra hard. We truly are in the same boat.
Nick and I were supposed to go in for our consult at the RCC yesterday but it got changed to thursday. Just the thought of all the money that goes into this makes me ill. Thankfully, we can sell some cattle! I feel your pain hun!! I would love to meet up sometime and go to the temple. Take care and good luck!!
All my love, Sher
Thanks everyone for the encouragement. I'm totally clueless about all of this stuff, so it's so nice to have good advice.
Kim--I haven't heard of the shared risk program. Can you explain it to me?
Kerith--Thanks for the useful adoption info. It's nice to know that there are a few ways to help ourselves out financially!
Sher--As always, thanks for your kindness. Best of luck with your appointment tomorrow!
The shared risk program is offered through the RCC. It covers up to 4 fresh IVF's and any frozen you have in-between. It does not iclude meds, predoiagnostic proceedures or ICSI. You have probably done most of the pre stuff so you are looking around $23,000.00 the first try but then only $1,500.00-$3,000.000 each time after that and even less with frozen. I wish so bad we did this. It is really a gurantee of a pregnancy. Go to the link on our web site...RCC. I hope I have my facts straig...ht it really is worth looking into. Good Luck!
Hillary Good luck! I hope this IUI works for you. But if not at least there are other options out there for you.
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